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Raising Men: 5 Ways To Encourage Integrity

October 17, 2020

When our boys are young, we don’t give much thought to that one day they will change.  But that day happens.

➕One day they will be taller than their mama.
➕One day they will eat their way through the pantry several times a week.
➕And yes, one day they will have to make tough decisions about pornography, substances, and dating.
➕One day they will have to learn to stand their ground when pressure builds to compromise and cave
➕One day they will lead businesses, families, churches, non-profits, and communities

The world is desperate for men of integrity.  

The one on the right, it’s his birthday today. 🌟 He’s one of those men.  

Faithful.  Kind.  Generous.  Principled.  Strong.  Disciplined. Loving. A leader. 

But when he was younger…. He was TOUGH.  

I prayed for this child more than any of the others because I was not so sure where he would end up.  

Mamas with young sons…. Don’t lose heart.  Don’t give up.  Don’t get lost in discouragement.  

Keep praying.  Keep training them up.  Keep teaching

You are raising a giant.

5 Things To Do To Encourage Integrity

1. Make them work

Physical labor is good for all people, and especially sons. Developing a strong work ethic is central to creating gratitude and integrity . Make up jobs if you need to, but be sure from a young age you have sons who are doing physical labor of some kind.

2. Hold them accountable

It can be tempting to look the other way when our sons do things that do not uphold integrity. It’s easier sometimes as a parent to ignore it than address it. Resist that response. In order for our boys to grow up with self control and a moral compass, they have to be held accountable for behavior and how they conduct themselves.

3. Teach them how to be confident in nature

Boys who have exposure to nature and the wilderness by means of camping, backpacking, climbing, river rafting, bow hunting, fishing, skiing, surfing, etc. develop a strength in them that is important. It also fulfills a need for adventure that matters to sons. Not to mention it gets kids off devices and into a place that feeds their souls. Taking the time to get our sons in nature matters.

4. Protect and educate about technology & pornography

We are in a digital pandemic. Our sons are being swallowed by technology – whether it is an unhealthy attachment to their phones and the apps on their devices to pornography and its addictive pattern, which requires more and more stimulus. We MUST be talking about pornography from the time our boys are young and help them understand the neuroscience behind why it is damaging to their brains. We can also help them understand why it is equally damaging to their hearts and future marriage.

5. Encourage healthy friendships & healthy environments

We become like those around us. The quote “Show me your five closest friends and I’ll show you your future” has truth to it. As much as possible, find healthy environments for your son to spend time. Whether is it the school he attends, church camp, youth groups, sports teams, etc. expose your son to as many healthy environments as possible and steer him away from those places and people that have a toxic impact.

What do you feel is important to know about raising sons with integrity?

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  1. Susan Lai says:

    We would probably also add “Cultivate a heart for community service.”

    We had to laugh at the nature comment. In an urban setting, bow hunting is not easily accessible…or perhaps has never been accessible for us.

    • Krista says:

      Hi Susan! Yes I would agree 100% and I need to add that to this list 🙂 Yes, your outdoors will be more hiking / surfing. For the record, my boys don’t bow hunt either. We just know a lot of people who do – haha!


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