How to Use Questions to Connect with Your Teen


Teens are fun, hard, simple and baffling all at the same time.  They require extra {of everything}.

I’ve been reading the teen experts to find out what makes teens feel loved.  What I hear over and over is that teens want to be heard.  They’ve been talked “at” for many years, now it’s their turn.

They want us {the parents} to really listen.  So… guess what I’m doing this summer?


The good news is that it isn’t hard, and it doesn’t take a lot of time.  What it does require is intention.  It’s not always easy  to remember to do the asking instead of the talking!

Here are some open ended questions to ask:

1. How do you feel about that?

2. What is your opinion on _________________?

3. What do you think your reward/punishment should be?

4. How should we do this task?

5. What is your plan for _________________?

6. Here are the options.  Which one should we choose?

7. Do you like ________________?

8. What would you do in that situation?

9. Do you agree with _________________?

10. Is this important to you?

What are some ways you are connecting with your teen?


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